I swear, the Holidays seem to be getting worse with each passing year... Every year, for the past 4 years I have had the same wish. "Please god, please. let me be a mom" I can't tell you how many times I have pleaded bargained with god. At this point, I don't even believe in him anymore....
I have decided to stop making resolutions/goals regarding my fertility because every time things don't happen, it kinda ruins my life a little.
Like today for example, I was supposed to call the fertility clinic and get my medication to try and do an IUI this cycle. I woke up feeling horrible. I'm pretty sure I have the flu or this is a horrible cold.
I decided to be nice to myself not put my immune system through hell.
So yeah, I'm extremely discouraged and sad. It's hard not to feel hopeless when things don't go according to plan... Sometimes, I don't even know why I put myself through all this trouble. I wish I didn't care about having a family of my own because my life would be a lot easier.
I'm still going to try and make a baby this cycle on my own. But lets be real, it's likely not going to happen.
I have decided to stop making resolutions/goals regarding my fertility because every time things don't happen, it kinda ruins my life a little.
Like today for example, I was supposed to call the fertility clinic and get my medication to try and do an IUI this cycle. I woke up feeling horrible. I'm pretty sure I have the flu or this is a horrible cold.
I decided to be nice to myself not put my immune system through hell.
So yeah, I'm extremely discouraged and sad. It's hard not to feel hopeless when things don't go according to plan... Sometimes, I don't even know why I put myself through all this trouble. I wish I didn't care about having a family of my own because my life would be a lot easier.
I'm still going to try and make a baby this cycle on my own. But lets be real, it's likely not going to happen.
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